I run this..

Ok. I realize that it's been a while since I updated, but I just haven't had the time. I've been away from home for a while actually. I don't even know where to begin...

The 19th to the 22nd I was at Central hanging out with my former roomies for Welcome Week. SO much fun. I can't even believe I can get away with having that much fun. Friday I drove 2+ hours to a job interview, and then drove back home. That night, I hung out with my brother and CB via XBox Live, which is also quite amusing when you have the Live Vision cams. We saw some kid almost burn his house down.

Then Saturday I went back up to Central for the night. It was pretty up there being one of the craziest nights I ever had. I've been having a lot of those. 2008 was definitely my year. Amazing. I'm going to be heading back up to school tomorrow until Sunday. I spend so much time up there, and I don't even live there. lol. I can tell my car's gonna get towed eventually. I should make sure I get a visitors pass time. Umm. Yeah. I don't know.

So I think it was kinda decided yesterday that I will be moving out east. New York style. Which, no joke, is going to be a complete different world to me. I don't know. January..I'm outta here!! Possibly December. Hm. I don't know. The person who wants me to move out East has been amazing me lately. Just. AMAZING!

My Xbox broke again. I have to send it in again tomorrow. I have to finish my laundry and write a grocery list. Tomorrow is the first football game of the season. Everyone loves college football (cept me..). I'm excited to be going up there again. It's really like my home : (

Alright, I'm about to go for a run, shower, and spend the next 9 hours on Xbox Live. I'm addicted, I know.

PS... I havent been to work in SO long, but I guess I'm not the only one...no one really knows what's going on. I think they're making changes? I have no idea. But I'm still doing some work from home so it's ok. I got in 7 hours this week! LOL. That's terrible.

XD.

It's a mob!

Ok, it's official. I'm addicted to the Mobsters application game on myspace. I can't even tell you how many hours I've put on that game within the last two days. It's disgusting. By the way, if you play, I need more mobsters in my clan so please add me.

I went to work yesterday at 3 p.m. knowing it was going to be a long afternoon. I had a workshop at 4 p.m. about resume building and portfolios and all that good stuff. Before that, I had to contact my media contacts to see if they received my info. I didn't really have any luck. But it wasn't a complete waste because I may have started a sales deal. Hmm.

I had another meeting at 7 p.m. which discussed a lot of things I didn't really know about, but I learned. The big topic is the intern show, which is on Sunday. This show has to go off with a bang. I don't really have a part to play in it though. I'm going to be at Vondie's for sure for the after party though.

I have a dentist appointment right smack dab in the middle of my partying week. The dentist is three hours from where I'm going to be. Which MEANS I can either drive three hours from college to the denist and then back, only to drive two hours back to my parents house, or just call and switch the appointment toooo the next week. Which I'm thinking I should do. I do so much driving as it is. This shit's just getting crazy though.

I drank so much coffee throughout the day yesterday until 8 at night, which means sleeping was not an option last night. I slept for about an hour before I had to get up this morning. I'm about to pass OUT. I'm such a better daytime sleeper. I just want to be awake during the night.

I didn't get to play XBOX yesterday, which is OK I guess. I really want to be in like..a 2v2 clan or 4v4 on CoD via Game Battles, but I'm not sure if I'm going to be completely dependable when it comes to clan matches. I can't just be available 10 minutes in advance. Some people in this world have jobs. Sweet, awesome jobs that I only have to go to the office for a couple times a week.

Now I'm just going to sit here, drink my anti-oxidant tea, and wait until I can go back to sleep. I'm so excited for sleeping right now. I can promise that I will be asleep in about 1.5 minutes.


<3
XD.

All work and no play....yeah right..who am I kidding?

Here's the deal. I like work. I like going to work. I like being at the office. I enjoy the time there. However, I hate not being at work. And I hate living so far away. For example, there's a meeting at 3 o'clock today that I was not particularly aware of. That's in three minutes. If I left now, I would be there around 4:30. An hour and a half late. This is why I would prefer moving down towards the city. So that when I find out last minute about things, I can be there without being an hour and a half late.

The meeting is for the intern show coming up on Sunday. Tomorrow I plan on going into the office because I haven't been there since Saturday. I'm trying to conserve as much gas as possible. And it sucks. Because I feel like I miss out on a lot. My duties are duties that I can accomplish from home, like emails and calls and writing things. But it's really not the same as being in the office. I would probably get more done. Maybe. Probably not. There's less distractions at home. I don't have to spend three hours driving either. And I don't have to spend $6 on parking. I'm DEFINITELY going to the office tomorrow. I really don't know why I've been so lazy all week. Maybe because of this killer headache (that I got from sleeping too much). It's a catch-22. I sleep to get rid of my headache but it actually makes it worse because I don't need to sleep 12 hours a day.

Things are about to get exciting/busy in my life. A lot of stuff is about to happen, and I'm already telling myself to take it one day at a time. I have plans every day for pretty much the next 3 weeks. We'll see if I still have my sanity at the end of all the craziness/work/partying/drinking A LOT. YAY! I need a coffee refill.

XD.

Fiddy!

Haven't been blogging as much as I would like to. I've been busy, but who hasn't? Just so you know, I spend most of time time playing XBOX. I play A LOT of XBOX. Yes, I'm a girl gamer. I play CoD2, RSV2, and recently, Halo 3. I bet you wouldn't of guessed it. On good days, I can get at least eight hours of gaming in. I usually play at LEAST four hours a day. When I look at it all typed out, I look pathetic. It's something I can deal with.

I love my XBOX. I can't live without it. I have met some of the most interesting people on Live. I have met some really good friends on there. Friends who I couldn't imagine being without.

Why do I love XBOX Live? I get to socialize, somewhat. But mostly, I get to be competitive. I get to be myself. I AM that person who trash talks (minimally) and yells at the TV. I even broke my headset the other day after throwing it at my TV, picking it up, and throwing it at the wall again. Headset cost $80, so it wasn't such a great idea. I don't know anyone who hasn't broke something from being angry. Lots of broken controllers, headsets, remotes, ect. I love it. I really do. I love gaming and I'm not afraid to admit it. I even joined GameBattles last month so maybe I can do the whole clan thing. No, nevermind, I don't want to.

I really hate being stereotyped as that ditzy stupid girl playing XBOX and going negative every game. I'm not that girl. I just went 25-2 one game today. I'm so awesome at CoD when I actually try. I really started getting bored with that game lately so I haven't been trying, and my KDR has been going down the drain. It's like 1.10 now, and that's terrible. So I have to start bringing that up.

If any who reads this actually plays, make sure you add my GT: x50calxsniper

Moral of the story: I not ashamed of my XBOX love

.............................................................................................................................

Also, I'm getting worried about the situation in Georgia with Russia right now. I have a feeling that things are going to get worse before they get better.

I walked/jogged 4 miles today. Big accomplishment for me. I need to do this if I'm gonna do the CRIM.


XD.

And the winner is...

So much has been going on lately that I don't even know where to begin. I can't believe its already Thursday, and since I tend to sleep the entire morning and most of the afternoon, the day is nearly over. I haven't been to the office since last Saturday (when I last blogged), but I've been doing my work from home.

On Monday I had to go to a rally in preparation for the next day, which was when the polls open. I ended up being an hour and a half late, which turned out fine. I got my t-shirt and my polling location and I was ready to go. I drove over to my brother's apartment to spend the night so I wouldn't have to drive an hour and a half at 5 in the morning. Well, it was raining that morning so I didn't actually get up until 7:30. I took a shower and ended up at the polling location at 9:30. Basically for the next 10 hours, I was out in the blistering hot sun supplying people with information about my candidate, hoping that they would vote for him. It was just so hot, that's all I can really remember.

Well I found out the next morning that my candidate came in a VERY close second, meaning he didn't win. But it was still worth it. He needed as much support as he could get.

Yesterday I was bored so I went to the theater to see Pineapple Express. I laughed a lot and really enjoyed it. I've always hearted James Franco in everything he's done.

There's a new walking path in my town that stretches 4 miles in length to the next town north of it. I'm going to go check that out that. Maybe I'll go the whole 8 miles, maybe not. We will see. I'm still preparing for the CRIM on August 23. Trying to get all healthy-like.

My brother became an uncle today! Congratulations on the baby J&S! It's the first baby within my brother's circle of friends, so I just know the baby is going to be well taken care of by everyone.

I don't have much more to comment on right now. I've been trying to get some stuff done for work and mostly hanging out. I hope you have a wonderful day!

XD.

Because I'm Gold

Being a "gold" person, it is important to me to keep my life in order by means of listmaking. I think in order to figure out what I want, then I'm going to make a list of, well, all the things I want. It would probably help me figure myself out a little more.

I also want to point out that its 10:37 on a Saturday morning. I got my ass out of bed for a 10 a.m. meeting on a Saturday morning. I drove an hour and a half to the city (Detroit), and I got here 20 minutes late (reaalllyy shitty morning). ANNDDD the meeting hasn't started yet...It's almost 11 a.m. If someone would've told me...I would've came at 11. So I wouldn't have had to wake my hungover ass out of bed at 7:30 for this. On a Saturday morning. It's alright though. It gives me time to blog. hehe. It's now 10:40. I should be sleeping.

Things I want:
-I want to be happy
-I want to make other people happy
-I want to make time for other people
-I want graduate
-I want to move out of Michigan
-I want to move East, West or South
-I want to have money
-I want to drive my OWN car
-I want to love someone who loves me in return
-I want to love someone who is willing to spend as much time as me as I am on them
-I want to stop feeling crappy all the time
-I want to stop starting these sentences off by I want

There's hella more that I want, but those are what's important to me.

I think the things that I want are things that everyone wants. The difference between wanting and having is that I have to go out and get these things. Money, love and expensive cars are not going to fall in my lap. I have to go GET THEM. I know this. The money's out there. It is. It's sitting out there, waiting for me. I have to go get it (legitimately). Don't stop trying; don't give up. If I want it, then I have to go get it. I wish I was the kind of person who works 80 hours a week, is never home, and is a millionaire by age 25. I choose not to be. I could be. But I'm not.

I don't know. I don't know about anything. Why can't the people that are supposed to love me just love me? It seems like I get in that pre-dating phase and everythings great, but once I'm in the im-your-girlfriend phase, things go to hell and other guys start coming into the picture. I have to push people away because I'm taken. This is making me think that I should stay out of the girlfriend phase and stay in the pre-girlfriend phase. The phase that gives you butterflies in the tummy. And things stay fresh and exciting and you can't wait to talk to them everyday...ahh the good times.

:)

Alright, its 11. The meeting I think might be starting soon. Maybe. Have a wonderful day!

XD.

It's time...

...for a rant. For sure. I'm just slightly irked and I need to get this out of my system before I can head off to bed.

My "boyfriend"--we will call him V--and I have a very complicated relationship. Things were so great in the beginning. Now, I don't think either of us has the slightest clue what's been making things shitty. Well, because of the fact that neither of us could deal with any more drama, I decided to stop constantly acting out at him because of my anger towards him and his complete and utter disregard for my feelings. He went out to sea (he's a sailor in the U.S. Navy) all week and came back today. I thought everything was fine and perfect and wonderful, ect.

Life decided to throw me a curve ball in the midst of my new beginning and fabulous new outlook.

V decides to tell me today that he might be marrying another girl by September.

Whoa whoa whoa....wait a minute...slam on the brakes.......what the hell did he just say?

This 'other' girl has been a longtime friend of his, his first crush, ect., andddd she is also an illegal immigrant. Who was secretly married, but her partner decided to have a real marriage because he fell in love. So because of this divorce, her immigration case has been frozen. She may be kicked out of the country.

So my so so awesome boyfriend fucking volunteers to marry her if worse comes to worse.

I really still can't fathom this entire situation. I feel completely tossed aside like a piece of trash. This girl that he's loved for years suddenly needs someone to marry her, OF COURSE he's going to jump at the opportunity. I had a bad feeling about her ever since he first told me about her. The way he talks about her so lovingly....

Whatever. Things are rough, tough, and complicated. The only conclusion that I can come up with is that if I love him, then I will have to support his decisions because he thinks that the decisions are the right ones. And if he loves me, then how the hell could he ever tell another girl that he would marry her?

I am lost, confused, sad, angry, torn....so many things. I just..don't understand why shitty things keep happening in this relationship. He wants me to go home with him for Christmas, but I don't see how I could do that if he's married to a girl living in the same town. I would feel so weird.

So what's the deal? Do I move on because of how low he just made me feel? Or do I support him? He said if he lost everything, he wouldn't regret marrying her. Does that include losing me?

<3
XD.